something inexplicably mine

you hold your heart
close to your chest
even to the discerning eye
it’s nearly colorless

but to me

it’s vivid
brighter
than nature’s greens and blues
illuminated by the noon time sun

i see you
as a man
strong
unbreakable

the young boy
you used to be
beneath the soft
brown
in your eyes

you contradict you

unintentionally
willingly
beautifully

there is something
inexplicably mine

within you

i am desperately
unable
to resist you

© jmr/2009

you are not the past

i am

drawing parallels

where there are

none

taking steps

to protect myself

where i don’t need to

you are not

the past

my fear is the only thing

standing between

us

step up

make me look myself

in the eyes

don’t let

me

go

© jmr / 2005

safe and sound

you bring out the lady in me
the one with impeccable manners
who knows just what to say
at a dinner party

you bring out the child in me
the one who finds joy in a butterfly
who lays on the grass and decides what
clouds resemble

you bring out the animal in me
the one who straddles you
flat on your back and holds your hands
behind your head

you bring out the woman in me
the one who nurtures the man
she loves with sweetness, vulnerability
trust and honesty

you bring out the dreamer in me
the one who doesn’t understand
the meaning of can’t… and strives
to achieve everything

you humble me
with every touch
every word
every moment i can rest so easily within

even when we’re apart
i’m always in your arms
safe and sound

©jmr/2009

promises

you will protect me
and i will love you
you will teach me
to live in the moment
and i will accept
you just as you are

we will
forever
carry each other
never taking
too much
giving
without measure

you will hold my hand
and i will hold your heart
you will burrow deep
into my warm embrace
and i will give you every reason
to believe in me

we will
always
reach each other
without even
trying
love
without condition

you will show me
truth
and i will show you
understanding
we will show each other
what we’ve both been missing

you will tilt my head up
to show me the stars
and i will see

i will mirror their shine
every time i look at you

i am yours
©jmr/2009

you don’t have to call first…

Before I met you, I had no problem with admitting that this was it – my life… and everything in it was mine (by my own doing, my own choices, my own mistakes)… all that I have, I earned… fought for… kicking and screaming and it’s mine… achieved with my own two hands…my own intellect… my own strength.

I know I’ll never be 17 again; when the future was crisp like the morning air and my life waited ahead, as far as the eye could see.

When I could race without fear, when there was still abundant forgiveness for my wiley and curious ways, when I didn’t have a care in the world…

As the years flew by, I became resolute… I fell into routine and made amends with the young woman in my heart… Apologized to her for letting her believe I’d still be able to make her laugh wildly, let her run recklessly with the wind blowing through her hair… I packaged my acceptance up neatly in a gift box, affixed a bow and tucked it away into the furthest corner of my top closet shelf.

Then I met you. And you shook me up. You came out of nowhere and made me question everything I do, who I thought I was, why I’d given up.

You gave me love… real love; unconditional and unwavering. You expect greatness from me… and I am starting to believe that the me you see is the me I already am… you make me a better woman; you make me want more, everything, faster, fuller and NOW.

I feel anxious, but not in the way that you think. I feel like I’m waiting for the future to begin and it’s so close I can taste it but I can’t do anything to speed things along. I have my eyes on the one thing that will make me happy and every day wasted without moving toward it is another day I sit here in the same place wishing on the same star dreaming the same dream and doing nothing to make it come true.

I have climbed up and grabbed the box from the top shelf, tore open the wrapping and tried on all the wishes I tucked away. I’m sitting alone in my room wearing my party clothes with no place to go.

Just come get me, already – I only need to grab my shoes. You don’t have to call first – I’ll know it’s you before I even hear the doorbell ring…

©jmr/2002

reckless abandon

Your touch ignites my senses
Our candor, something I’ve never experienced

The way you take control when things get scary for me
And gently guide me back to
Feeling normal again

Our laughter, from the very start
The purest sense of joy
The sweetest lightness of heart

The innocence as we stare wide-eyed
At what we have together

We watch with wonder
We open up with reckless abandon

We are vulnerable to the safest other person
Each of us has ever known

I see what I like best about myself in you
I see what I can become in your eyes

You are someone I can be myself with
My deepest, most intimate self

You wrap me up in your arms
And bury your body inside mine

To get closer – not to take from me
You re-awaken my sense of belief
And trust

You make me feel brand new

© jmr/2001